Breaking Bad Sly Cooper: Walt and Jesse Teams Up with the Cooper Gang
by THE PETE PETERSON EXPERIENCE
Summary: Walt invents a machine to go to Sly Cooper's world with his best friend Jesse Pinkman.
1. Chapter 1

Breaking Bad Sly Cooper: Walt and Jesse Teams Up with the Cooper Gang

Chapter 1 Jesse Pinkman

walt and jesse we're smokin some killer green at the white family basement playing nba25k15.

"oh look at this! DUNK SHOT MOTHERFUCKER" walt said. he was blazed wikked deep. his eyes were red because he was smokin so much killa green.

"yo this is bullshit mr white whi are you so good at the video gaming and shit bitch?" jesse said. he was getting owned like a bitch.

"you see jesse i know a lot about sciense so i trigger thant into this here video game ya see?" wal said with a wink on his face. he was in his underwear but he had a t shirt with his face on it and it said heisenberg under it because he made his own shirts and shit on so it's not gay to be with him his best friend jesse pinkman. walt was lying though he was using cheat codes to beet the system and fuck with jesse's head.

"mr white your so smart bitch its just not fair!" jesse said. he took a hit from a bong that was attached to a huge ass fucking generator that got him higher than the sky if you undastand me.

"yo i'm gonna go home and plow jain because that's something i'm actually good at bitch!" jesse said. he went out the door and ran away.

"JESSE!" walt said.

"WALT! get the fuck up here. NOW." skyler said. she was a bitch. the audience booed because fuck skylard.

"what the fuck do you want skylard. get it? i'm calling you skylard because your fat you fucking cow." walter said as he got some cheers. walt came up. he was eating a greasy and creasy cheeseburger and it was getting in his creasy and greasy old man chest hair. he was sweatring because he dindn't want ot pay the heat bill no mo.

"do you see it? DO OYOU SEE WHAT OUR SON IS DOING?" skylar bitrchd at walk. walt put took his louey vatton dsunglasses off and saw walt jr. he was on the table and he was fucking a plate of pan-cakez and bacon and eggz. he was using maple syrup as loob.

"so that's where all the mayple sirrup is going." walt said with a big ass grin on his face.

"WALT what the fuck? OUR SON IS HAVING SEXUALL RELATION SHIP WITH BAKON? DOn"T YOU SEE WHAT IS FUCKING WRONG HERE. WALT?!" skylar yelled at walt.

"god just shut the fuck up already." walt said as he kicked the table. he was mad. then jesse came in thru the window as the audience cheered.

"yo mr white i forgot my marawanna pipe." jesse said. he had a big ass pipe under the table. it had his face on it. he was smiling. like on his pipe but he was also smiling becauzew he fucking found it! they were both smiling ok.

"WALT IM TIRED OF U EATING THE MARAWANNA OK JUST SSTOP WALT. WALT." skylar said.

"yo like quit being a bitch, bitch." jesse said. walt laughed so hard he peed his underpants and had to get a new pare. but it was a special pare. it was underware but it had a sleivelss shirt attached. it had his face and dimonds and shit and jewlry. it was part of his fly and fresch as fuck clotching line like called HESIENBERG cloths. it was legit as fuck.

"gotta love my heisenberg swag." walt said.

"mr walt im sad let's go to a whole new world where like there are half human half animals and shit that'd be dope. I just wish that exist" jesse cry and cry

"Jesse don't be said." walt said as he hugged his buddy. "I discovered that very place in college with a portal. lucky for you i tsill have the means to make portal."

"YOU MEEN IT" jesse said cryingly

walt flipped a switch and the kitchen was now a computer room. walt hit the doo dad with his dad dong (cuz he's a dad get it) and a portal showed up.

"this is it"

"nice portal" jesse said. it was cool.

"let's leave this world behind. OH WAIT"

"what is it mr white I hope we can still go to animal world"

"oh yes jesse. we just need to pick an animal to be."

"I wanna be a cat." Jesse said immediate. "I thought about dis for a long fuckin time."

"okay I'll be a wolf cuz there fucking cool."

walt gave jesse a scientifik magic potion and they both drank their own, jesses drink was red and walts was purple.

"let us go to...the animal kingdom." walt said and they jumped through the portal, transforming intot he animal people they drank the potion to become them.

"it's like...a whole new world." jesse said. he looked down at his hands, which were now paws. he was covered in pink fur now and was a cat. walty was a blue wolf.

jesse cried and cried because he was so happy.

"jesse we're here. the animal kingdom." walt said. "bitch."

"thank you mister wait."

meanwhile, hank had to go get something from walt jr. he walked into the living room where skyler was crying really fucking loudly. like if you were her neighbor you'd be fuckin pissed because fuck she was being loud.

hank walked up to her. she kept cryin. he decked her with his right fist and knocked her down, then threw her out hte glass window.

"that'll shut the bitch up." hank said. "I wonder where walty is."

he wasn't in the houe (because he was in the animal kingdom). hank didn't know that last part.

he looked around and saw the portal.

"ok" hank said as he walked inside.

walt was in trouble. you wanna know why he was in even more trouble? later on, skyler followed him inside, and so did walt jr. uh oh. uh. fucking. oh.

next time: sly cooper gang meets walt.


	2. Chapter 2 sly meets walt

Breaking Bad Sly Cooper: Walt and Jesse Teams Up with the Cooper Gang chapter 2

"Bently"

a/n: fuck infamooooos so fuckin rad SHIT. only thing that woulda made it better is some COD stiyle multiplayers

Sly, bently, and murry were sitting on the couch playing infamous: second son. murry sucked at it so they let sly play.

"sly we have to turn on the news im checking google inbetween jackin it to porn not gay porn you dicks but like whoa something is going down" bently said.

sly flipped him off but bently had a reblote that changed the channel so sly died in the game.

"FUCK"

the news came on. there was a video of a portal.

"shit this looks like a big fuckin deal." muggshot who was the news dude for some raising/

"oh fuck sly they opened a portal. we better go investigate." bently said.

"why" sly said. he really wanted to get dat trophy

"there might be cool stuff to steal." bently said.

"ok" sly said.

"ill stay here" murry said.

"fuck off mury you can't play my ps4." sly said, and kicked murrys nutsack and testicules.

they left as murry cried in pain and followed after them because they needed him to drive while they kept gaming in the backsteat. they played titanefall now and it was pretty fuckin rad. if they like combined titanfall and infanous thatd be cool.

then they got to the portal. flakes were falling out.

"sly dont eat those!" bently screeped sticking his neck out long as sly stuck his tung out.

"why hte FUCK not."

"i think they are remnant of a forgotten place that will kill youuuuu." bently said. "oooo."

"Fuck." sly said.

"you ate one didn't you." bently said.

"maybe" sly said.

"well did you or didn't you"

"I said maybe is that not enough"

"no"

"why"

"Fuck Bently, perhaps I may not fucking remember"

"but sly"

"nnnbut snnnly" sly said funny making fun of bentlys geekie voice.

"you just did it."

"alright fuck I ate one okay shit."

"youre gonna dy sly unless you get the cure."

"actually your not." a mean voice said behind them.

it was a wholf and a cat that showed up. but like you know like people too like the way sly is.

"who are you." Sly cooper said.

"I am walter white." walter white said. "but you can call me hysenberg."

"ok"

"sly doesnt have a nickname" murry said. "Hes not cool like you."

"Mr uhh white BITCH what do we do now?" jesse pinkman said.

"we need to explain to these "bitches" jesse that the flakeys from the sky are harmless."

"ok" jesse said. "now what"

"well...now what?" walt said to the gang.

they stared at each other for longtime. something wass gonna go down.

"let's fucking get high as shit." walter white said, throwing a bag of weed in front of sly. sly sniffed it with his good nose and he was suprised how good it wuz.

"shit this is good. let's go."

they went back to the hideout and were frends now.

"so you guys are uhh fuckin thieves bitch? that's pretty fuckin cool." jesse said.

"yeah. and you guyz make drugs?"

"we do a lot of stuff." walt said. "maybe we should partner up."

"okay." bently said. "you and me can work on science and you can help sly with everything else."

"yeah bitch! fuckin sweet!" jesse said.

"On one condition." walt said, putting his hisenburg hat on. "the hippo goes or we dont work with you. he looks like a fat gay faggot retard and i don't want him to roo-in my hizenberg swag."

"well then sorry guys i guess the deals off" murry said.

"fuck you murry get the fuck out of here." sly said.

"yeah!" bently said. "Fuck you and your stupid mother"

murry cried and ran away his heart was broken. walt jesse sly and bently blazed it up and played titanfall and infamous all night

-elsewhere-

hank schrader woke up in an office. he looked in a mirror and was really scared because he was not human anymore and shit. he was like a rabbit

"hello. you might have some questions. but before that I need your help." someone said in the darkness.

"help with what. what hte hell am i" hank schaper said.

"you are part of the animal kingdom now. but thats not important."

a lady hand slammed on the desk.

"two of your worlds biggest criminals broke in and are now working with my worlds biggest criminals. we are going to fucking rip out their organs and display them on the town square so no one can ever fucking do crime again or they'll be fucking with our shit. my name is carmelita fox, and I will fucking murder anyone who breaks the law. no mercy. no scope. one bullet."

hank looked at carmelita. she was really hot. he wondered if he could have a wife and a girlfriend.

"so what do you say...partners?' carmelita said.

all he wanted to do was find walter white, his brother in law. if he could catch big criminals it would be cool too.

"okay" hank said.


	3. Chapter 3

Breaking Bad Sly Cooper: Walt and Jesse teams up with the cooper gang 3

BBSC3

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Chapter 3: "Walter White"

a/n: this is the chapter when they really start to get shit done.

walt and sly and bently and murry i mean jesse not murry beause they ckicked him out in the last japter. they stayed up past their bedtimes and pulled an alld nighter! they stayed up drikning lots an klots of monster energey. they were all really high and would just NOT stop smking that killa khronic. there was asmoke all overed the city! and it was coming from the cooper hidw out!

"this video game pretty fun, bitch" jesse said. sly wwas checking his facebook account.

"guys i'm gonna make a status about the next crime we're going to make but i can't thing of any letters?" sly said. he was mad blazed.

"you racoon fool! you racoonish fucking foool you" walter said. he stood up and crumbs of cheesty poops roled down his greasy and creasy shirt that was cova'd in greasy creasy cheeseburger sauce and some of his own sauce.  
"don't you see what this doing?" whalter said in a loud voice. he put his hands up right away.

"if you post about are criminal acktivity on the internet this whole thing will be fucked! do you not know the first rule of scrime!" walty screamed at them.

"mr white do not do this yo! mr white im gonna cry." jesse said. he got scared when walter yelled in his mean scary voice.

"yesse do not cry. you will not crying when we are getting millions of money. we will pull off the big heist! we will break fucking bad! we will do a lot of things! we will steal things too! and make meth!" walters said. now sly jesse and bentley were insprired by what walter whit was saying. he knew a lot about science. especkially the sciense of krime. jesse was now crying tears of happy not tearz of afraid. walter put on his heisbenberg hat and smiled at bently sly and jesse. they were about to break bad for real this time!

"walt! walt! walt!" sly jesse and bentley said. walt joined in..

"walter white! walter white! walter white!" walt sly jesse and bentley said. they danced aroud da room and show they meant fucking business.

then a portal open up. in the cooper room living room. skylar came out of it! but she wasn't an animal. person. even thogh she wuz in the animalz kingdom and everyone there was half human half animbal.

"yo mr white what is your bitch doing here?" jesse said. he wasn't krying anymore.

"i don't know. jesse. i just dojn't fucking know. i know shes a bitch which is why she didn't transform! SKYLAR IT IS ILLEGAL FOR HUMANS TO BE HEAR!" walte siad.

"mr white im scared," jesse saidy.

"jesse do not cry tears of mad now. what are you doing here skyler you fat cow?! DO YOU SEE WHAT I AM DOING SKYLAR! I AM PROVIDEING FOR MY FAMIELY!" walter screaminged.

"walt come back to the humanw orld walt. i'm yelling at you this right now. you cann't provide for our family in hear walt, its time to go back to the real whorld!" skyler said in a mean bitchy voice at walter.

"no." walter said all cool. he dropped his heisenberg hat in the dut.

"walt you cum back right now." skylar said. she looked at walt in a mean ugly way.

"no you bitch." walter said.

"walter please. i'm crying tears on my face for you." skylar said. she pointed to her face as she cryed. she was faking sad though. she just wanted walter back so she could be a bitch to him.

"no." walther said.

"walllllllt." skylar said. then sly whacked her with a cane and she fell back in the portle. she was bleeding a lot.

"AHAHAHAHAHA GOOD ONE BRO!" walt said as he gived sly a high six because they had hands and then their tales. it wasn't gay ok? then they heard policez sound outside.

"OH FUCKING NO BITCH." jesse said.

"oh my god no." sly said. he was scared he was about to fianaly get caught! because he stoled a lot of money.

"arrest! come out with your handz up in the air!" carmelita said. she got in.

"you big dummies." angend hank scharter said.

"you really think this will work do you walter white?" carmelita said.

"how do you know my FUCKING name?" walter said. he really wanted to knowe.

"we know a lot about you walte.r you don't belong here walty. inspecktor focks is going to help sned you back to our world tbhe human world. ylou fucked up the law here walty your going to be in jail for a long fucking time." hank said.

"you will be under arrested of the law for making meth!" carmelita said.

"and you little shit sly coopeur. i'm just gonna wahck the shit out of you for stealing because that's not against the law too!" hank said. he took out his gun and his badge.

"how did you know we was here." bentley said slow. he wanted to fuck with their headz.

"you dummies wer smoking too much mairnhaiuna and there was a lotta smoke in da city." cartemelia said.

"ohhhhhh." sly said. he drank some beer.

"DRINKING BEER IS NOT LEGAL HERE TOO YOU MOTHERFUCKING FUCKER!" hank said. he tryed to shoot at sly. but sly was too fast and hit hank with his cane and really bopped him on the head.

"owwie!" hanked said as he falled down.

"RUN AWAY" walter said. they all ranned into the cooper van and drove away. they were getting chased by a lotta copz.

"oh no oh my god." bentley said.

"oh my gosh bentley stoping being a bitch. fuck the police!" sly said. he took out a rucket luncher and blew up cops. now sly and walt and bentley and jesse were really under arrest of the law for killing cops!

"we need to steal things! fast!" bentley said. he was right.

"you are right. we need to pull of the biggest histe." sly said.

"and we need to cook a lotta meth. right now!" walter said. he got into his underwear and they started cooking as sly and bentley stole a lot of things because that was their job because they they where theeves. walter and jesse sold the meth and made a fuck load of monney.

"we break bad!" wlat and jesse said at the same time.

"and make steal!" sly and bentley said.

"WE KICK ASS!" walt and jesse said.

"we fucking rule!" sly and bentley said.

"we ARE THE COOPER BREAKING GANG BAD!" sly water jesse and bentkey said at the same time and high fived at the same timee.

"but how are we going to get awayed from teh fuckong police?!" bentley said.

"leave that to me." walter said as he made a weird wrinkly face with his forehead.

walt pressed a button and the cooper van flew into space. away from the cops! they were all mad but they just couldn't catch walter and jesse and the cooper gang!

"we done did it!" bentley said in a weird voice.

"yeah we pulled off tha biggest heisty haha." sly said. he was high again.

"what do we do now mr white" jesse said.

"we stormed the castle and KILL the ANIMAL KING SO I CAN BE THE NEW KING OF THE FUCKING ANIMALS" walter said.


End file.
